It’s strange how the human mind works. Everyone wants to be trusted and believed but don’t want to trust anyone. In modern times there is little match between the spoken word and the thoughts in the mind. Sometimes they are a shade different and at other times diagrammatically opposite.
This was not the case a few years ago when people were really nice and honest and trust was a common factor. Then what exactly changed, why this distrust to the point that now dissensions have become the order of the day and that too on a whim or a speculation which although untrue just cannot be wiped out. Suspicion is rife, ruining the best of relationships and projections are being made on the flimsiest of grounds many of them make believe, only in the eyes of the seer.
Why would any individual be willing to see or imagine things that don’t exist and this despite the others honest assurances that this is not the case. I have seen the funniest of reactions where just silence on my part due to a completely unrelated cause has caused a real emotional riot in the opposite party and the amazing thing is that I was nowhere near to any of the conclusions drawn to or dreamed of. Speculations and things were ascribed to which there was no connection for the subject matter itself was not in the thought at all. Strange but real!
From my point of view it was funny and also sad, for the misery that people put themselves through unnecessary and wrong speculations in personal relationships or otherwise can really ruin a perfectly healthy environment.
So why has this lack of trust gained such a momentum in our lives that one is driven to take positions even before the event and anticipate the outcome without thought or proper study. Most of these speculations are hardly thought out properly or examined in the right context and at best are emotional reactions colored by personal experiences and the so called light ears that will listen and thus believe anything and wrong sets of beliefs.
The steady decline in the value systems has added to the woes and the word seems well on its way to be purged from life and will just be a little used word in the vocabulary list
Thus this is one of the many casualties of modernism and a need to promote, where a lot is said and very little meant. So people will say something like…..I’ll call you later and never call, or I will help you and never mean it, or say” Meet you at 10 am!” and turn up at 12 noon, or “I shall finish tomorrow!” and goes quiet on it until one has to call again……there is a constant postponement, non-deliverance and lack of commitment and promises are spread around like flowers that have an instant death when plucked from the plant. So no sooner the words are out one has to re-plan the time frame so as to reset everything at your end as protest just doesn’t bring results and only postpones things further…Really! You don’t want to protest? These are the harmless ones. The others are more dangerous involving double talk and double dealing that has now become the order of the day and harm you if you don’t spot it in time. It’s not surprising that the good and the straight forward, now found few in number have lost both heart and faith.
Herein lies the crux of the problem. People have become tired, loose in their reactions, take everything standing down, just wait for things to happen, lack energy to change things and all in all are just not interested enough to bring about the change. Whatever may be the reason for this, valid or invalid, it’s not making things any better.
All this means that a few are controlling the majority and whose fault is that? Further people are afraid to argue, keep things on the table and be forthright and demand an explanation. Silence is another culprit due to which nothing gets solved and matters are kept hanging in the air.
Trust is not going to come back on its own. One will have to change not only attitude but will have to develop the enthusiasm to put things right and not allow misunderstandings and speculations create castles of suspicion and in the air full of empty postulates with riders to a theorem that never existed.
So what is the solution? Well its really very simple…just be honest, put everything on the table and hash it out once and for all so that a final decision is reached and both parties can get on with their lives together or separate with no regrets attached and no falsities left lying around to speculate on further…clear the air so to speak. It’s time that rationality replaces emotionalism and a mature thought process is reinstated, consciously.