Category Archives: Life




                      HOW MANY OF US ARE READY

                     TO DO GOODNESS TO ‘LIFE’ ?







                                    AND MAKE LIVING UNBEARABLE……………!



With time being the constant constraint and tiredness a constant companion due to competition healthy and otherwise and the materialistic concerns that rule life now a days, there seems to be an avid reluctance to thinking, to going beyond the purview to do that little bit extra that makes one stand out or be different. Of course everyone wants to be different …in fact that is the name of the game for success and growth…. but in what way different and why, is another thing altogether.

Be it the workplace, home, social functions or even when one is alone the uppermost thought is… well, let’s just do what is wanted and not take that extra effort …after all it’s not paying is it? What’s the point? There is neither time for it, and the money and the inclination.

This attitude has come down in everyday life and leading to tremendous degradation in relationships as well as the way we look at others, which is mostly in disdain and disgust and lack of complete sensitivity to the others plight. This has increased the distance among the humans and the relationships are becoming more strained, matter of fact and with an attitude of ‘just get the job done.



There is a great affinity for the past. In fact the mind has a definite curiosity about it. There is this continuous need to delve in it and find out the reason for the existence or the non-existence of particular thing or a happening.

While on the one hand it is an avid research going activity in the realm of the roots of our existence, it also is a great teacher of what matters most and what doesn’t , what needs to be discarded and what requires to be stored for future reference. It’s the ongoing story of growth and development and also a great storehouse of knowledge that has been kept for reference in the event of recurrence of events, long thought of as extinct.

In personal matters the past literally is the reiteration or re-living of the many occurrences in the mind which is more or less a psychological aspect. Many times it is termed as nostalgia, and in other instances it could be a mental condition signifying the deterioration of the brain or in other cases just a matter of depression. Thus if a person has AVP or a PTSD like condition then they will return again and again in the past and relive events some of them traumatic thus affecting the psyche of the person.

There are various reasons why even a normal healthy person lives in the past. Firstly it could be kind of escapism. The individual may not want to deal with the present situation and would like to put it off for tomorrow or prefer not to deal with it at all. It’s easy to go to a happy place in the past and stay there as one feels safe and is engulfed in a soft cocoon of safety and here there is no need to deal with anything.

Then there are happenings which leave an impression on the mind, some of them good and the others bad. The good ones don’t trouble much but the bad ones tend to pull one down as the images flow in the head time and again creating a fear psychosis that leaves a definite imprint on the mind and personality of the individual.

Certain experiences are filed away for future reference so as to increase the security and act as a warning system, to skirt around possible repetition of the unwanted experiences.

The past can be a dangerous place with constant re-visitations of traumatic experiences , as the mind is wont to do, can lead to health issues and a erode the mental health  of the individual.

The past should be used as a tool, a weapon if you will, to enable one to guard against negative experiences. The past   experiences are a stepping stone to progress and growth, it is a store house of knowledge, to be visited only when required, it’s a library of happenings, it’s a stepping stone that enables one to make future projections and make informed decisions.

The past is definitely not to be hung on, caught into like a web or to hold on to like a security blanket. Especially if it has experiences that are of a negative kind and add little value to you present life. The past is about learning and moving on. The past should not be allowed to inhibit your future, it should help to elevate one to new levels of thought processes and implementations. It has to be used as a tool to move ahead.

It is therefore necessary to be discriminatory about the past. One has to be rational and practical, discard the inhibitors and shelve the helpful experiences for future reference.  The Past is for learning to discover the future. It’s beneficial only if you know how to use it. Otherwise it is easy to get lost in a maze that will make you sink deeper into a darkness that can destroy your very essence


Nobody loves for love’s sake,  because that kind of love requires sacrifice, and there

is only one that is prepared to do that …….that is the mother for her child . This is

the only relationship that has stood the test of time,  as the mother and not the child

 is ready to do the utmost, even at the cost of her own happiness or her life.

Rest is just give and take in the name of love

The Game of Groupism

Indeed there is no shortage of groups. Name any subject and you have a group. And why not? Humans are a scared lot and find safety in numbers. Its these numbers that create lobbies and pressure groups, its these very numbers that help to change the course of history , and help in the removal of despots. Be it at the family level or international, groups have played a vital role both in creation as well as destruction.  Political parties have been routed, countries have bowed down to the pressure of international group-ism, evil social customs have been wiped out, new laws have been made and old ones removed, movements have been started and even nature has found its support in group movements. Any issue has become an invitation to group pressure tactics   where the like-minded band together in the hope of success. This will go to any lengths and end up in fast unto death.

Thus if there is something that hurts Freedom of Expression and Speech outcome the journalistic and news world with vehement protests, if it’s something against the teachers then they go on strike together, if it’s a religious act or utterance against another then there is a big hue and cry and there are marches and even riots, and if it concerns the labor then the Unions are always waiting to join in at the drop of a hat.

The Rulers want something and the ruled want something else altogether. There is group-ism within the administrative structure and then to top it all there is the group-ism within groups. Then there are the WhatsApp groups and the Facebook groups, various intellectual elite societies and the Freemasons and professional groups. There are also groups at all status levels, and job types…’s hilarious…the list is huge …and not to forget the religious groups and the caste and nationality. In India even the people of each  states having common language and culture  band together and have their own organizations…it’s amazing how the likeminded and the people with similarities always get together and may even refuse so called outsiders to come in. Thus we have political parties…groups comprising people with common ideology and then there are groups formed by ages  and educational groups like the literary clubs and the scientific groups and then not to forget those made on the basis of  sex, caste, color, creed etc.

The way these groups form coalitions and separate is yet another amazing phenomena. There are various reasons ranging from the personal whims and fancies of the leaders of groups or those within groups, to that of a common threat. So when the minor parties are wining, the larger parties will form a coalition to register a win if they are short in the number of votes, never mind the differing ideologies and thought polarities…and once they win, again start the internal dissensions! This of course does not benefit the common man or those that are not part of any groups though the latter are few in number as these are individualistic people and are not followers by nature.

The psychology under which a group operates is quite different from say the individual, when he acts alone. The group has its own structure and system and together with rules and regulations has a hierarchy and office bearers etc. in the event it is a well-organized. Even in loosely knit groups there is a tacit understanding between the individual members and work fine as long as there is unity among them along with a certain like mindedness.

Then there are groups that are formed instantly when the issue touches the very core of human existence, and they disappear just as fast, once the issue is resolved And now there are varied groups formed on the net some of which are such that the members don’t even know each other but come together for a common cause across all borders.

Although groups are a very good support system yet they are not always the ultimate system in that many times it will fail to support you especially if one goes against the current and are a dissenter. The last of which are rarely appreciated as a matter of course anywhere. Too much adherence to groups can hinder individual progress and render you ineffective in your personal life and identity formation and make you at times faceless. One can hide very well in a group but one can hardly excel on one’s own terms especially if you are given to independent thought and assertiveness. Then there is the constant crossing over from one group to the other and change in loyalties which completely shatters the belief and trust factor. So the word commitment just doesn’t form a part of the picture.

It’s very important to choose the group one wants to join. The reason for this is that it could completely change you and your thinking process, sometimes to the point that you seem like a stranger to your near and dear ones. Joining groups to enhance status or due to societal or peer pressure or just because one feels unsafe could leave one more depressed and unstable. Many times one will end spending time on needless activities that neither enhances your knowledge or personality and one becomes just one of the sheep in the flock.

What makes one joins groups and does it really help in achieving your goals and enhancing your personality and development? Or is it just a convenient escapism from fear of being alone or responsibility and accountability? Has the individual become ineffective? The groups seem to be getting larger and larger and everything is banding together…soon there will only be group thought and group activity and group wars and competitions and perhaps all the leaders will also form a group to control the rest of humanity…a small group controlling all the other groups! The individual thought, originality and creativity may well vanish in this Game of Groupism, making everything common.

Perhaps entire humanity will only unite in the scenario of a threat to the planet from outer space. Until then we will remain divided in groups.


Let’s step back and take a look at the thousands of years that have gone by…yes I am talking of all the species that lived on this earth including man ….it will include both flora and fauna.  From the single cell to humans, each species has a story to tell. And of those that survived the various shocks and trials and tribulations of this planet and the cosmic events have a story to tell of their evolution and development as a species

Man has gone through a lot over the ages, travelled the path towards civilization from a primitive stage and did much to enhance both his surroundings and gained knowledge and built on it and is proud to proclaim the many achievements…never mind that they are still just like a drop in the ocean and has added very little value to the quality of life in real terms barring a few exceptions.

The  other species have thrived and survived and are true to their nature and perform as they were programmed to do but did evolve in ways that we are still to understand…although man has the avid need to profess that he does so even when he doesn’t.

While there is a difference among the species in the way that we are equipped  as far as skills  and the type of brain  , man was given the added benefit of a thinking brain that would help it to change  and create and evolve in ways that would be different from other species…thus we see the tremendous changes that have taken place in terms of living patterns and the creation of societies and the various goods and services and creating a business, social, political, religious , economic and psychological environment to cater to his every need and make life more comfortable and easy to live.

Then why is it that he/she still cannot overcome the need to behave like an animal?……..Is it really difficult to change ones attitude for the better…clearly when one does so there are the benefits easily visible and common sense should prevail….. Continue reading DEGENERATION OF A SPECIES